When at an on-premise swingers club or swing house party, you are there to have the best of times and to share the uninhibited enjoyment associated with those who have discovered a new dimension in their lifestyles. Once you have become familiar with the surroundings and staff members or host/hostess, try to become as at ease as you would be at any other social gathering. Don't hesitate to introduce yourselves to other guests. You'll find them eager to welcome you and to help you blend into their circle of sincere camaraderie.
While you are advised to be congenial and outgoing, don't be "pushy". Many couples who are new to "swinging" often have unrealistic expectations and are not prepared to handle rejections that may sometimes occur. Freshly showered, perfumed, and neatly dressed people make more contacts. Don't let your personal physical idiosyncrasies stop you from having a good time. No one is perfect [although it is common for new "swingers" to see others as more attractive or more verbal than themselves]. Don't let your own mind be your worst enemy. Be prepared to handle rejection but don't take it personally.
It is important to remember that PERSONAL CHOICE is the right of every individual and to 'respect that right' is only common courtesy. Learn how to accept "no thank you" graciously. Your approach -- which should be the same as it would be at any social setting -- is a key factor to your acceptance as a desirable partner/friend.
There are several variations to "swinging" and it is important that you and your mate decide, in advance, those which you like and dislike. Some couples prefer to be alone, while others prefer to be with other couples. Establish your own ground rules, but please decide on them BEFORE you start "swinging".
Some people will probably "break the ice" by introducing themselves, along with other couples they know. It's their way of making you feel at home. Feel free to join their conversation and you'll find that most of them will be happy to answer any questions you may have about the "swinging" lifestyle. Be open and honest. Tell them that you are new to "swinging" and you'll discover how helpful people can be.
On your first venture into the swinging scene, you may feel somewhat uneasy about seeing your mate with someone else. Some "swingers" want to share swinging with their mate and feel uneasy having their mate leave to another room with someone. Everyone has their own reasons for their feelings and all feelings are real and should be respected. To avoid embarrassment or disillusionment, discuss your inhibitions with your mate beforehand. Both of you may be more comfortable after talking to other couples and learning how they handled their first "swinging" session.
My husband and I have been in the swinging scene for more than 40 years between us, and we have noticed that as the number of people in the scene has been increasing, so has the bad bahaviour.
Some of it is because people just do not know how to behave in the swinging lifestyle, so we have added the following pages to our swingers sites to help explain how you should behave in the swinging lifestyle.